The Keynote speakers for the LLC weekend are Jaco Lourens and Jo Arnone. Jaco Lourens will be joining the conference from Cape Town South Africa and will be speaking at the opening ceremonies. Jaco was the first Mr South Africa Leather in 2009/2010 and current leader of their club, SA Leather. Jaco will be […]
The 2014 Philadelphia Leather Leadership Conference recently announced this year’s workshop presenters and panelists. The weekend offers over 50 presenters with a variety of different types of learning environments including lectures, workshops and panel discussions. The presenter’s list includes national, regional and local presenters including many who are training professionals. This year there […]
The KinkLINCS leadership conference is fast approaching on April 12 – 14 in Seattle, WA. I spent some time talking about the conference with one of the producers of the event, Gene Romaine. Great stuff! Check it out after the jump
Kink LINCS is a Leadership and Community Building Symposium being held in the heart of downtown Seattle, from April 12-14, 2013. If you are part of a Leather, BDSM, Kink, Fetish, Poly, Swing or other sex positive community and are interested in developing your leadership, teamwork, communication, and / or involvement in your […]
Why is it the ones who have been around the least are compelled to force the greatest change?
It used to be that it was just the "Hets" who were coming in and polluting the waters. We would hear them talk about "Honor, Integrity, and Civility' ad-nausium, while we headed for the bar and did what we did. They pontificated and ranted about how "Leather" they were, their proof being in how connected they were to respected Leather people and the litany of Leather history they knew with a healthy does of name dropping that could seriously clear a room. Faux Leather people are easy to spot, because that kind of behavior is pretty much an indictment about what they are trying to be, rather than who they actually are.
But in the last few years, this scenario's been bubbling to the surface from within. There seems to be a flood of people who are desperately trying to climb the socio-political ladder among us (yes, I'm well aware of how antithetical those two words sound in relation to S&M and hot pig sex, but let's, for the sake of illustration, think about this for a minute), who have, through some niche, found notoriety. Now, I'm not opposed to attention – I don't think any of us are. However, when the tool you use to "up your street cred" is one of controlling the message and stifling opinions that differ from yours, that's problematic.
There's a lot of talk of "Leadership" and who will be our leaders moving forward and the campaigns and the campaigning are visible if you look in the right places. There are people who have risen to be our de-facto leaders, and they differ from region to region but they are well known names to all of us, who didn't campaign for the privilege. They didn't talk leadership to death. They didn't proclaim to be the historical authority on all that has ever transpired in Leather because most of them were there and can tell you what they experienced first hand. They achieved this de-facto position by being decent people. Their motive for every thing they did for their community wasn't to rise to some kind of position and every word they uttered or wrote was not crafted as part of a platform. Chairs need to be put away, jello shots need to be sold, shit needs to be done. And for the most part, these people rolled up their sleeves and did it. They didn't stand around and talk about what they were doing or going to do – they were too busy doing.
by Deborah Isadora Wade
He shows up at every event. A camera hung around his neck. No one pays him. He rarely gets a plane ticket. His pictures are not passworded and privatized. You can use every one of them in any video, photo, or private project. His style of leadership is quiet, humble, respectful and just a wee bit “think dirty thoughts”. He is one of the examples of servant leadership and one of my personal leadership role models. I think dirty thoughts as often as possible!
In the world of business and management the Holy Trinity of leadership research is Lewin, Likert and Goleman. Almost all of the leadership styles and words we use come from their work. Lewin was kinda the Godfather of behavioral psychology. He started the whole “Let’s watch white business men boss each other around and make wide spread conclusions about all human behavior!” From here on out I refer to them as the “threesome”.
You can thank the threesome for all the studies on management styles and how they think we lead. Lewin, along with Likert, basically invented social and behavioral psychology. The leadership trinity was sort of the management equivalent of Richard Sumner. I like Greenleaf’s equivalent of a Bunny Watson.
First, I want to summarize the threesome. It is, I believe, important to know where our language comes from around leadership. (OMG this is theory people. Be careful not to get yer brain electrified by it.) These are words and concepts we all use in relation to leadership skills. The cultural language of the business world, in the eyes of the threesome, crosses every job we hold and every organization we belong to in our lives. Doesn’t matter if it is the Daughters of the American Revolution or the Daughters of Scotia, we use the same organizational vernacular.
On Becoming A Leader: Or How to Run For The Invisible Kevlar Title Vest
by Deborah Isadora Wade
Introduction to Leadership
I was, in another life a college instructor. I taught or attempted to teach social workers and teachers how to be good leaders. Now some people are born with innate gifts of charisma, skill and knowledge. They naturally shine as leaders. We all may have parts of this but the most of us have to learn it. Yes. I said, “Learn it.”
Leadership is not bestowed upon you by the Great Title God/dess. It does not come free from strife, drama and frustration. A leader knows when to keep the calm and when to stir the fucking pot. When to step back and let people do their jobs and when to step in and kick ass. The leader gets to deal with the proclivities, inappropriateness, ego, animosity, ex boy/girl friend drama, and run a meeting or organization.
Leadership is a skill. It comes with a skill set: To Envision: to create possibilities, to see the big picture of organizations; To Inspire: impassion others to participate, to educate and engage; To Think: to be educated on human behavior, group dynamics and protocol; To Act: to show up, the means start, call the meeting, get the facts and the feelings and make a decision; To Evaluate: to constantly being willing and open to critical criticism. (By critical criticism I mean criticism that is helpful, that has suggestions or options for improvement not a bitch session of whining disapproval.)To evaluate is to examine programs against mission and vision and to have the courage to not fear change, to distinguish between honoured tradition and innovation and take a risk. To listen with as little resentment as possible to how things could have been better is an experience in humility.